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My Most Hilarious Rejection Letters
Rejection is the gift that keeps on giving! You’ve heard what people say about comedy coming from pain. That’s why I laugh at rejections. Be on the look out for these 10 standbys; they may show up in your inbox!
1. The rejection used to repair furniture
“When my office was moved yesterday, your enclosed manuscript emerged from under my desk. I am sorry.”
Hey, it’s okay to use my manuscript to prop up your desk!
2. The one-book-per-minute rejection
I once had ten picture book manuscripts rejected by an editor in ten minutes over the telephone. That’s a book a minute, an all-time record!
3. The “You don’t exist” rejection
I wrote an essay about my childhood fear that I didn’t exist, which was accepted by an internationally renowned journal. I was ecstatic. Now I’d know for sure I existed! Then, just before the presses rolled, my editor informed me that his boss didn’t find my piece “as charming” as he did, and my essay about nonexistence became nonexistent.
